My fiance and father of my 2 yr old daughter and I went through a rough patch and he left for a week. When he came back, we talked a lot and things have been great. Today, I get blown out of the water with a phone call from a girl I have only met once claiming that during that week back in May they had sex 2x. He denies it wholeheartedly and confronted her about it.

She doesn’t waver that it happened but the details such as who could back her up, where and how many times has changed a couple of time. I do not know how to handle this at all…he has never given me reason to doubt him before and this completely devastated me.

I am currently pregnant with our second child due in February. I do not know who to turn to as we are relatively new in this very small town and I don’t want to just blast my business out there. How do we go foward? Do we go forward? How can I trust him and get over feeling like it defines my self worth. I have never been in this situation and am totally lost.

Her Plan: Confront my partner

I recently found out that my husband may have fathered another child while deployed to afghanistan a year ago. Six months into the deployment i found emails that the two had exchanged and he said it was inocent he never would cheat and that i was insecure. I believed him and moved forward.

Needless to say i was home taking care of our family and pregnant with child number three. A few days ago he recieved an email and it was pictures of a baby. The female wrote me and told me that she was under the impression that i knew about the child and the affair. She stated that my husband knew she was pregnant.

He finally admitted that they slept together and it was a mistake. I cant stand the thought of my husband loving another child like he does mine. I am heartbroken and left with unanswered questions. My husband is currently in afghanistan on a civilian contract. I love him so much i just cant believe he would do this to me and lie. He was suppoed to be serving his country not getting another solider pregnant. Where do we go from here. What about my three small children? Im left with so much heartache. What should i do?

Your Plan: Work it out,Revenge

Advice For Others: So hurt:(

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We’ve all been there (and if you say that you haven’t then quit lying to yourself, sister):  post break-up when the cold lonely nights arrive and you’re alone in the bed the two of you once shared, listening to the deafening silence of a phone that’s not ringing and clinging to your pillow while visions of happier times ravage your dreams.  It’s all enough to turn you into a bigger mess than you already are.  So what do you do?  You call up your ex and try to salvage any kind of communication in an attempt to dull the pain of your aching heart.

After a break-up it can be very difficult to completely stop talking to the guy you once called your boyfriend.  But if you have any hope of actually getting over him and moving on with your life, then be sure to check out the following reasons why you should get a grip, slowly back away from the iPhone and quit talking to your ex:

#1:  You have enough friends.  Sure, in a fantasy land you’d like to think that the standard “we can still be friends” break-up line will work.  And it’s a nice idea, but let’s get real…being friends with the guy you were once madly, deeply in love with is recipe for disaster—at least after recently terminating the relationship it is.  Hanging onto your ex as a “friend” will do nothing but hamper the getting over him process.  If the guy hurt you beyond repair, why would you want a friend like that anyways?  You already have friends—and they are likely with people who wouldn’t rip out your heart and smash it into a million little pieces.

#2:  You become incapable of finding someone new.  Even if you say that you’re completely over the relationship, continuing talk to your old flame only keeps you from lighting up a new one.  You know how they say, “out of sight, out of mind”…well it definitely works when applied to your ex.  Put him out of sight so that you are able to open up your mind and heart to better things.  Of course, you might not be ready to jump headfirst into a new relationship right away, but sometimes a fresh Band-Aid is just what it takes to heal an old wound.

#3:  You’re living in the past.  If the relationship was great at one point, then it is something to be cherished…and it’s okay to reflect back on the past every now and then.  But if talking to your ex has taken reflecting to the point of moping around in the worn-out t-shirt he left behind, compiling old pictures into a slideshow played to a Taylor Swift song, and skipping out on important things in your life because you can’t manage to pull yourself together…then it’s time to cut off your ties with him.  If he broke your heart, talking to him will only remind you of the hurt.  Why waste any more of your precious time living in yesterday’s sorrows—you are missing all of the wonderful things going on around you now!  Rip off that rear-view mirror and set your sights on a new tomorrow.

#4:  A frown looks good on no one.  It doesn’t matter if you bear an uncanny resemblance to Heidi Klum—sadness is a look that is never in style.  And because you are likely to still be holding onto pain from the break-up, in most cases, talking to an ex results in debilitating sadness and enough tears to make Hurricane Katrina look like a light spring mist.  When it comes down to it life is too short to be unhappy.  So put down the phone, pick up your smile and face the world with a positive new attitude now that what’s his name isn’t consuming your time with unhappy conversations.

#5:  You need to accept the break-up.  Breaking-up is difficult—especially when you were the one to get kicked to the curb.  But it’s called a break-up because it’s broken and typically that means that it’s over for good.  If you still talk to him, more than likely you’re going to miss him…and this can lead to the break-up/make-up game (a game that in most situations tends to end even worse than it did the first time).  Instead, learn from the relationship and don’t continue torturing yourself.  You know all too well how much the first break-up with your former boyfriend hurt, so why go for round two to see if will hurt again?

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Joe Morris is guest post author who enjoys writing about dating and relationships. 

Additionally, Joe also contributes his work to Best Free Dating Sites where he writes articles about safe methods of dating on the internet.

VISIT HIS WEBSITE AT BEST FREE DATING SITES.

Many married women are burned each year when a spouse passes away or they get a divorce because they haven’t made good financial decisions when they were married. Wondering which mistakes are most common for married women? Here are six that you should avoid.

1. Letting him call all the shots

In many families, one spouse calls all the financial shots and completely controls the purse strings. While more women are starting to handle the family finances, it’s still common for the husband to deal with most of the family’s financial information. While it might be easier to let the more organized or savings-oriented spouse do most of the bill-paying and budget-following, you should always be aware of where your joint money is going.

Solution: Have monthly budget meetings, and make sure all financial accounts are accessible to both you and your husband. It’s even a good idea to pull copies of both of your credit reports every three or four months so you know you’re both accountable for any credit you take out personally.

2. Not building personal credit

Too many married women automatically join all accounts with their husbands upon their marriage. This isn’t a problem if you’re truly a joint owner of those credit card accounts, mortgages, and car loans, as you’ll both be building your credit together. However, being just an authorized user on credit card accounts and not having your name as a co-signer on loans means your husband is building credit, but you are not.

Solution: Make sure you are a co-signer on auto loans and your mortgage, and keep a couple of credit cards in your own name. Keep the activity going on these accounts, as well, because a credit report with no activity for more than six months usually won’t give you a FICO score at all. If you already have joint credit cards, consider taking out a balance transfer credit card and putting some of your joint debt on it. Pay it off responsibly, and you’ll build good personal credit easily.

3. Not having individual savings retirement

Too many women, especially those who stay at home with the kids, don’t have retirement accounts of their own. This is dangerous for a couple of reasons. For one thing, you may not have access to your husband’s account in the event of a divorce. For another, you need to be saving enough as a couple that you can both live comfortably once the working spouse retires, and this means contributing to a retirement savings account for both of you.

Solution: Meet with a financial advisor to discuss retirement saving options if you stay at home. You should be able to open a Spousal IRA if you aren’t working. Your husband can contribute to this IRA out of his income, and get the same tax deductions he would get for contributing to his own IRA. This means more tax-advantaged retirement savings for the two of you.

4. Giving up a career entirely

According to the 2006 US Census, the number of stay at home moms is one the rise – up about 18% in ten years. While it’s great to be able to stay home with your kids, getting completely out of the workforce – or staying home before you have a career path established – can be financially risky. In the event of death or divorce, you’ll need a job to support yourself and your children.

Solution: It’s okay to make the decision to stay at home (as long as your husband is contributing to your retirement account in the meantime.), but you should try to stay in touch with your career field. Do some freelance or consulting work during naptimes, go to professional events, or even do some work in your field for free. Also, hang on to old work contacts who might be able to help you launch a career when you’re done staying home for whatever reason.

5. Not having life insurance on both spouses

All too often, couples only get life insurance for the working spouse. This is a huge mistake, though. Think about the value of the services you provide for your family if you’re a stay at home mom – childcare, cleaning, cooking, running your household. If something happened to you and your husband had to pay for these services so he could continue working, how much would that cost each year?

Solution: Have a financial adviser help you figure out how much your services would be worth to your family and determine how much life insurance to get. Then, take out a term life insurance policy to cover your family in case the worse happens.

6. Saving for college before retirement

Many moms are so focused on their children that they want to start college savings as soon as possible. This isn’t a bad thing – unless you’re saving for your child’s college education before saving for your own retirement. No one else will finance your retirement, but your child can always get loans and financial aid for college if need be.

Solution: First, set up a good retirement savings plan that has you saving at least 10% of your income in retirement savings (or more if you’re living off of one income). Only once you’ve established your retirement savings plan should you open college savings accounts for your children and start working those into your regular savings plan.

Daniela Baker from CreditDonkey, a mother of two herself, says these six financial mistakes can prove devastating for married women who end up becoming divorced or widowed. While no one likes to think about these possibilities, it’s wise to plan for them just in case.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Daniela Baker from CreditDonkey, a mother of two herself, says these six financial mistakes can prove devastating for married women who end up becoming divorced or widowed.

While no one likes to think about these possibilities, it’s wise to plan for them just in case.

VISIT HER WEBSITE AT CREDIT DONKEY.

“I wrote ‘I’m Free’ because I surprisingly found my boyfriend of 7 years cheating on me with another man,” explains Hayla. “But guess what? I didn’t freak out at all. Everything was cool because a person needs to be true to himself first. I was just so amazed that I didn’t figure it out sooner! [Laughs] We were both set free to find our true selves.”

Hayla moves into the #23* spot this week on the Billboard Dance chart with “I’m Free.” The single is gaining at radio and is currently in rotation on BPM on SiriusXM, MusicChoice, FusionRadio.fm, iheartradio, and many top dance and mixshow stations.

“I feel so blessed to be supported by all these immensely talented guys who remixed ‘I’m Free.’ Every mix stands on its own merit and I am so proud of this package,” states Hayla. “The clubs have always been a home to me and I am nothing but thankful for all the love we are feeling. I’m sending a big hug and smooch to each and every DJ and radio program director out there for spinning ‘I’m Free!’”

Combining sultry lyrics and hypnotic melodies, Hayla has teamed up with some of the leading names in dance music to propel the “I’m Free” single into the ears and hearts of millions internationally. “The remix package contains stellar productions from Ralphi Rosario, Mixin Marc & Tony Svejda, DJ Bam Bam, DJ Riddler, Mike Rizzo, Super Stylers, Dave Matthias, Finbarr Massi & Dan De Leon, DJ Drew G, and the KlubJumpers. “I’m Free” is originally co-produced by Hayla, Zarotek and Gemini.

A high-fashion concept music video for “I’m Free” is currently in production and is expected to be released at the end of March. Hayla recently performed at Colony and at My House in Los Angeles to packed venues receiving rave reviews. Additional performance dates are forthcoming. The singer-songwriter is also busy readying her 2nd full-length CD, which is slated for release this June.

To purchase “I’m Free” on iTunes please visit: http://itunes.apple.com/us/album/im-free-remixes/id500088120.

Follow Hayla:
http://www.facebook.com/haylaofficial
https://twitter.com/haylaofficial

ABOUT HAYLA
Drawing musical inspiration from a multi-cultural background that includes ancestry from Egypt, Greece, Yemen and Spain, multi-talented singer and live percussionist Hayla brings a dynamic dash of exotica to the global dance scene as she boldly declares: “I’m Free!” Hayla secured her first label deal in Israel at 17 and quickly scored a #1 chart hit. After moving to the U.S. in 2005, she lived first in Miami and then settled in Los Angeles, where she currently works with a unique array of musicians and producers. Over the past few years, Hayla has toured the U.S. with the Arabic group, the Yuval Ron Ensemble; was lead singer for the Jewish Symphony; sang at comedian Wanda Sykes’ wedding; and recorded vocals for several projects by Academy Award winning composer James Horner (“Titanic,” “Avatar”). Her single “Paulina,” sung in both Spanish and English is also currently charting in clubs and on dance radio.

For Media Inquiries and Materials:
Media Giants
Jim Strzalkowski
T.: (310) 652-2283
Email: jim(at)mediagiantsusa(dot)com

Authors Sarah Rutherford and Clodagh Higgins have just launched their manual “The Single Man’s Manual – A Guide For Men Who Are Suddenly Single Again.” The book contains dating advice for men, and asks them to take a critical look at the person they are, both on the inside and out, and guides them back into the dating scene again, with renewed confidence.

Through their own dating experiences, Rutherford and Higgins, realized that men, especially those who had been in previous long term relationships, had lost sight of the person they are.

“We had our own ideas about what dating tips to offer men, but it was only after we surveyed men of all ages, that we saw that there were a variety of personal and social issues to address as well,” said Ms Rutherford.

“We found that men often need to ‘rediscover’ themselves before they are able to successfully date again,” said Ms Rutherford. “For instance, reconnecting with hobbies and sports will give them interesting topics to chat about online or on a date; simple things like losing a few pounds, trimming nasal hair, and connecting with an ironing board will help them to make a good first impression!”

In “The Single Man’s Manual – A Guide For Men Who Are Suddenly Single Again” Higgins and Rutherford cover topics that include:

• Starting Over
• Confidence and Positive Mental Attitude
• Hobbies, Interests, Art & Culture
• Social Interaction and Friends
• Fitness and Nutrition
• Online Dating and Dating Tips

“The manual is a non-confronting guide to help single men to build the confidence they need to establish new relationships,” said Sarah. “It is a great gift for a man who has found himself single again.”

The Single Man’s Manual – A Guide For Men Who Are Suddenly Single Again is set to become the foundation for a new television show. Dating tips and more details about the manual can be found athttp://www.thesinglemanslifemanual.com/

About The Single Man’s Manual

The Single Man’s Manual has been created by Clodagh Higgins and Sarah Rutherford, who, through their own dating experiences, met a variety of men who were searching for companions, and love.

These experiences showed them that single men, who are looking for relationships, need help – big time!

And, because they are women on a mission, they don’t beat around the bush! They know the big turn offs for women: poor hygiene and the moaning about ‘exes’! In The Single Man’s Manual they reveal dating tips that are the big turn-ons as well.

Most importantly though, Clodagh and Sarah interviewed men who had just come out of long term relationships. It was through these men’s stories that many of the issues surrounding being ‘suddenly single’ were put into perspective for them – and the real heart of the Single Man’s Manual began to beat.

The Single Man’s Manual – A Guide For Men Who Are Suddenly Single Again, is now destined to become the foundation of a new TV program.

Details are available at TheSingleMansLifeManual.com

Chocolate, possessed of natural chemicals that unleash positive feelings in those who indulge, is in a class of potent love foods that bring extra meaning to the table this leap year, says Ecole Chocolat Lead Instructor Pam Williams.

“When it comes to marriage proposals, it’s often the man who takes the initiative. But this is a leap year, and that brings up the ancient tradition of women doing the asking,” Williams says, adding: “Not that women need the calendar’s permission to do so anymore – today’s women take charge in any arena they want. But marriage proposals tend to follow more traditional models, so things are more relaxed this year.”

Leap year happens every four years, when an extra day is tacked on to the end of February to make up for six hours every year that our calendars aren’t able to accommodate. It’s a way of keeping the world’s seasons from eventually spinning off track.

The tradition of women doing the proposing is thought to have started in fifth-century Ireland when St. Bridget complained to St. Patrick that too many men waited too long to propose marriage. Legend has it that St. Patrick agreed and said women could turn the tables on their reluctant men every four years on Feb. 29.
Combine this tradition with the feel-good substances found in chocolate, and you have a recipe for at least a lovely evening of romance. Chocolate brims with theobromine, a mood enhancer, as well as phenethylamine, which triggers the release of pleasure-inducing endorphins and activates dopamine, a neurochemical associated with sexual arousal and pleasure, according to John Robbins, best-selling author of several books on food and health.

So without further ado, here are some easy recipes from William’s bottomless bag of chocolate goodies. “They’re sure to win anyone’s heart, whether there are wedding bells in the picture or not,” she says. One word of advice: “Use the best quality chocolate you can get your hands on. We’ve suggested several brands but any fine chocolate should work,” Williams says.

Scotch Lover’s Chocolate Truffles

Notes: We used two 100g bars of 60% dark chocolate from Green & Black, but use any good chocolate that has 60% cocoa solids. We used the full amount of Scotch to get a stronger flavor, but it also made a softer truffle. Cut the cream by a tablespoon if you want a firmer truffle but more boozy flavor or just go with one tablespoon. If you prefer milk chocolate – which is also delicious with this – reduce the cream by a third. The recipe will work with other liquors or liqueurs.

Yield: Makes about 14 one-inch truffles

Ingredients:

• 7 oz. (200g) dark chocolate (60%), chopped fine
• 1/3 cup (75ml) whipping cream (or 1 tbsp. and 2 tsps. if using milk chocolate)
• 1-2 tbsps. Scotch
• About 1/2 cup (125g) finely grated chocolate for rolling the truffles and unsweetened cocoa for dusting hands.

Method:

Place finely chopped chocolate into a high-sided bowl or the bowl of a blender. Place cream in a saucepan over medium heat until hot but not simmering; remove the pan from the heat.

Pour hot cream over the chocolate and mix thoroughly with a blender or a hand-held immersion blender until you achieve a smooth consistency. You can also stir by hand with a sturdy whisk, spatula or wooden spoon.
Once chocolate is thoroughly melted, add Scotch, one tablespoon at a time, and stir well to blend. Let mixture stand at room temperature for at least one hour and up to two hours until ganache is firm.

Dust hands with cocoa. Scrape spoon or melon-ball cutter across surface of mixture; quickly press with fingertips into 1-inch (2.5cm) balls. Drop the balls into the grated chocolate and roll until well coated. Place on Silpat, wax paper or parchment paper to set for several hours.

Store truffles in the refrigerator in an air-tight plastic container or bag for 1 week or freeze, triple wrapped, in freezer bags for 1-2 months.

Coffee Fanatic Chocolate Truffles

Notes: We tried this recipe with both 60 percent dark and good quality milk chocolate (Divine). The dark chocolate produced an intensely flavored bonbon that is lactose-free and is guaranteed to be a black-coffee and dark-chocolate addict’s dream. Those who prefer their coffee with cream and their chocolate with less bite would like the milk chocolate version better. Reduce the amount of coffee by one third if using milk chocolate.

Yield: Makes about 14 one-inch truffles

Ingredients:

• 7 oz. (200g) dark chocolate (chopped fine)
• 1/3 cup (75ml) coffee or espresso, depending on how strong you want the coffee flavor (or 1 tbsp. and 2 tsps. if using milk chocolate)
• 1/2 tbsp. salted or unsalted butter (optional)
• 1/2 cup (125ml) unsweetened cocoa for rolling the truffles

Method:

Place finely chopped chocolate into a high-sided bowl or the bowl of a blender. Place coffee in a saucepan over medium heat until hot but not simmering; remove the pan from the heat. Or microwave coffee in a cup for 30 seconds.

Pour hot coffee over chocolate and blend in blender or in bowl with hand-held immersion blender. Or stir with a sturdy whisk, spatula or wooden spoon until you achieve a smooth consistency.

Add butter, if desired, and stir into the mixture until very smooth consistency is reached. Make sure all chocolate lumps are melted. Let stand at room temperature for one to two hours until ganache has set and is firm.

Scrape spoon or melon-ball cutter across surface of mixture. Dust hands with cocoa and quickly press truffle with fingertips into 1-inch (2.5cm) balls. Drop the balls into the cocoa and roll until well coated. Place on Silpat, waxed paper or parchment paper to set for several hours. Store truffles in the refrigerator in and air-tight plastic container or bag for 1 week or freeze, triple wrapped, in freezer bags for 1-2 months.

Founded in 2003, Ecole Chocolat Professional School of Chocolate Arts offers a portfolio of programs for chocolate making – mastering techniques while gaining the expertise and business knowledge needed to become a professional chocolatier or chocolate maker. Ecole Chocolat’s founder Pam Williams is the recipient of the Award of Excellence in Service to the Industry from the Fine Chocolate Industry Association. For more recipes, see our website: http://www.ecolechocolat.com/chocolate-recipe.php

Temporary child custody is something that you want to consider immediately upon your separation. While several folks assume that since it’s “just temporary” there is no need to be involved regarding it and therefore they treat it casually. Temporary custody is really terribly vital and will have a huge impact on permanent custody. Once youngsters are settled into a routine when divorce you’ll be hard-pressed to induce it changed.

Divorce cases can take a long time to settle. Even divorces with no disputes can take months from start to finish. When there are disagreements the process will be delayed by months or maybe years. The aim of temporary child custody is to create a legal arrangement during the time the divorce is being settled. This could stretch to months or maybe years.

One in every of the deciding factors that can be taken into consideration for permanent custody is where the kids have been living on a brief basis. The main factor that a choose will study in family court is how the children are adjusting to the separation of their family. If the kids are obtaining along well throughout temporary custody, it could be tough to get the custody arrangement changed. In several cases temporary custody simple turns into permanent custody.

If you are considering filing for permanent custody of your youngsters the time to begin preparing is straight away upon separation. You must take a look at temporary custody as the stepping-stone towards permanent custody. Things that has to be thought-about embody the children’s college, the living arrangements, primary caregiver and the preferences of the children.

When one parent moves out the kids are sometimes left to measure in their regular home with their alternative parent. This usually offers the children fewer problems to resolve since they will have their own home, own space, regular friends and faculty to support them. If you’re going to seek custody of the children you would like to attempt to remain in your home along with your children.

Barring any alternative problems with parenting or abuse things child custody most often transitions from temporary to permanent. A family judge can possibly keep the children in the house they’re aware of instead of uprooting them to alter parental custody.

Once you’ve got been awarded temporary custody, do not assume that your fight is over. You want to still prepare for the event of a custody battle for permanent custody. The former spouse might strive using any tactic necessary to urge custody whether or not it suggests that dragging you thru the mud. An attorney can facilitate your prepare your case to make sure that you are prepared for the permanent custody hearing.

About the Author – Jillian Cook has been writing articles online for nearly 2 years now. Not only does this author specialize in Child Custody ,you can also check out his latest website about: Install Hardwood Floor Tips Which reviews and lists the best DIY Flooring Hardwood Floors

I found out in December that my partner had slept with a girl at his workplace. It apprently happened early on in the relationship but says he cant remember exactly when. He also says it happened twice, but I dont know if this is true.

They still work in the same place and I am finding it very hard to get rid of the images that float around my head. I can go for days and we are so happy then all of a sudden I get a thought or an image & I wanna lash out at him but I keep it in & it just stews.

The most frustrating thing is he tells me I need to get over it, it happened ages ago, so just move on. But in my head it is still quite fresh & I have questions that are unanswered. But to be honest sometimes I crave the answers, other times I wonder if its best not knowing.

The whole thing is so confusing. We are good together and we love each other and want to move on from this, but I feel he has forgotten too quickly & he feels I have remembered it for too long.

Your Plan: Work it out