Comments on: A Concerned Friend – Should I Tell Her?

By: rae anne

rae anne — Fri, 05 Nov 2010 01:30:28 +0000

I am on the other side of this. I have been cheating with a friends husband for over a year and a 1/2. She wasn’t a friend till he introduced us.My husband and I are friends with them and neither one has a clue. We love each other but our situations are practical so we stay. Him and I are trying for a baby and now SHE wants one too. I WANT her to find out, but not that its me.

By: Emily

Emily — Fri, 22 Oct 2010 18:45:13 +0000

if you feel you can’t tell her then have it out with him. Let him know that you know, and he either has to tell his wife or stop the cheating completely, or both. If i was you i would give him that ultimatum, also tell him if he won’t come clean then you will tell his wife and confront his “girlfriends”.

By: Orrymain

Orrymain — Sun, 10 Oct 2010 21:58:40 +0000

I think it’s hard for folks to come back sometimes and say what happened, but I’d like to know too how things turned out.

By: deltic

deltic — Thu, 07 Oct 2010 14:43:58 +0000

Tara, it would be good to know what you did and how things worked out?

By: deltic

deltic — Fri, 01 Oct 2010 22:18:48 +0000

Orrymain sometimes you have to follow your conscience whatever the consequences, you did the right thing.

By: Orrymain

Orrymain — Fri, 01 Oct 2010 18:56:04 +0000

In many ways, though, it’s a no win for the person who knows. I’ve questioned myself a million times about what I told because it cost me, but I couldn’t live with myself if I’d kept the lie.

By: Katharina

Katharina — Fri, 01 Oct 2010 15:35:03 +0000

Another thing to consider is that whenever in the future she’d find out by some other means, you’d have to always hope that she never found out you knew all along, or the friendship could suffer anyhow and nothing would have been avoided.

By: Orrymain

Orrymain — Fri, 01 Oct 2010 03:57:09 +0000

Here’s the thing — as the messenger, you may get killed. I’ve been there, done that, so be prepared. However, I couldn’t live with knowing such information. As a friend, I felt I had to tell the information. It hurt the friendship — misplaced anger, but at least they knew the truth.

By: deltic

deltic — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 20:33:08 +0000

You know your friend, so try to think about how she will react and tell her in private so that she has time to compose herself before having to deal with other people.

By: Christine Mattice

Christine Mattice — Fri, 17 Sep 2010 01:20:25 +0000

I think that I would tell her that he’s having an affair. Don’t be surprised if she turns on your at first for being the bearer of bad news, though.