Well i met this guy online and we had been talking on the phone for about 4-5 months and we really started liking each other the only bad thing is that he was in the philidellphia and i am in pittsbrgh area. Any way he wanted us to become more serious and i wanted the same so he said he would move to pittsburgh with me. He also stated that he would buy me an engagement ring and we would get married however i have suddenely noticed that he is doing dissappearing acts on me and hi birthday just passed and he went somehwere out of town telling me that he would be back that weekend but he never came back and its now been 6days since ive talked to him. This is not the first time this happened and i feel he is doing something he is not suppose to do or trying to break us up by doing thing st to hurt me. What do you think?
Your Plan: Confront my partner
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Unfortunately, it sounds like you need to do some checking up.
Have you tried contacting his job to see if he’s there?
I agree – That does sound suspicious. Sorry, I’m a little confused about whether you’ve actually met him in person?
I expect you have if you’ve talked about becoming engaged.
My advice is to be very careful. It does, indeed, sound like he’s up to something very suspicious. I think that this is worth a “look-see.”
I think it’s especially challenging if you don’t have contact possibilities for him other than online or by phone.
I hope it works out, but it reminds me of how things online aren’t always as they seem in real life.
I agree with Taggart. Though you can be fooled in a face to face situation, it is so much easier to be fooled in an online and phone one.
Men have multiple ways of telling a girl that he needs to break up, but seldom say the words.
Got it? He’s gone. Let him be.
my YM is tetziecou, btw.
I’m sorry to say that I wonder if he was ever telling you the truth. It is possible that he was having his own little online fantacy, and now that it has become complicated he has moved on to something else. Be very cautious, you only know what this man has told you about himself, it could all be lies.
I think Justontime may be right. He possibly wasn’t what he seemed. For one reason or another he has lost interest, maybe his wife found out what he was up to and put a stop to it. Consider it a lucky escape.
I think you have found out to your cost that there are a lot of sad people out there on the internet. I don’t think he was who he claimed to be. Forget him and spend some time with your real friends
I think you have found out to your cost that there are a lot of sad people out there on the internet. I don’t think he was who he claimed to be. Forget him and spend some time with your real friends
I tend to agree with the advice to move on, and at the same time I guess in the back of your mind there still may be the thought that there’s a legitimate reason you haven’t heard from him. So moving on may be tough, but I think it’s the thing to do.
Relationships born on the internet are 90% doomed to failure. People just aren’t who they seem. You may want to rethink it and go for plan B.
Orrymain, I am not sure I agree with you on that. I am sure there ia a likelyhood of relationship failure, but if people are cautious and use their common sense I don’t see why the internet should not be used to make friends.
There are too many horror stories about computer matchmaking for someone to let a guy move in without meeting him! This guy sounds like a user:do you have your engagement ring yet? Kick him out fast.
I read a book that was recently published called “Meeting Your Match Online” by Tamsen Butler. It’s a very common sense approach to keeping your wits about you while investigating online relationships. It was recommended to me by a friend who had read it and she was right, it’s very good.
Thanks for that recommendation heretoday, it sounds like a very helpful book.
I wonder how things have worked out for Anita.
As in all relationships, online ones need honesty. The ing is that with the internet you can be whoever youwant,and say anything you want with little chance of being found out. Anyone embarking on an online relationship should be very cautious about information they give out, promises that are made etc.
I don’t agree that online relationships are mostly doomed to fail though. I think it’s no more or less likely than any other kind.
I agree with you Stav, I am not convinced they are doomed to fail either. You are right that people must be extra cautious, even photos may not be real. People should be very careful not to put themselves at risk.
Sadly too many people fail to follow even basic plans for their security. Such as meeting for the first time in a public place, telling people where you are going to be, and who with. Not exchanging too much personal information etc.
I just re-read this post. It really does show how cautious you need to be. I think internet relationships can work, but without actually meeting someone you can not be sure that they are what they say they are. It sounds as if this chap could be leading a double life, maybe he is married.