I’ve been dating the same guy for 7 months now he means so much to me. we seem to argue alot because he can never admit that he is wrong even when its clear to both of us and i somehow always end taking the blames so i apolozige and everything is good again. but i’ve been doubting him lately because of the way he acts he use to care alot about me first 3 months we started to go out but he been so diff lately i dnt even get him anymore he can go a whole day without calling or txtn. he use to check on me every moring but that stopped too. 2 days ago we were hanging out i picked his phone when he left the room to check i went through his msg and saw that he was talking to a girl about having sex with her and he was going to drive to her house. but because of some reason he didn’t get to go. after i read the msg i didn say anythin he came back in the room nd saw that i had his phone nd snatched of my hands so i told him he dont need to hide anything because i already read the ! msgs after i told him about he kept swearing saying all kind of things like he was not gonna go there is was jus a conversation i jus remained silent because i could not think straight or what to say.after a little bit i jus tried to forget bout he still havent apolozige. but later that night i wa contacted by a friend who told him he was having an affair with a girl she knows and he also when to her birthday which i didnt know about. when i asked him he told me that she was just a friend but i couldn’t believe that. so we argued about it so i told him we might need some time apart he said sure if that’s what i want. after that he told me if he leave this time he never coming back. all i said was ok. i really love him i keep telling myself i got to let him loose but i jus cant do it. help please
Your Plan: Ignore it,Confront my partner,Work it out,Leave my relationship,Revenge
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This man is showing you no reapect at all, what is more he is arrogant and controling. Forget him, life with him would make you very unhappy. You deserve better.
deltic is right, this man is cheating on you, he is controling and he doesn’t care about your feelings, get out while you can, you would not be happy with this man
I agree that he is showing you know respect and this is what you probably have to look forward to in the future. Sadly he is not thinking about you but himself.
In fact it may well get worse the longer you were together. You have told us how angey he gets, if he has no respect for you it is possible that his anger could become physical.
I rather think that kernow is right about the possibility of his anger escalating. If he disrespects you now things will not improve and it is very likely that they will get worse.
You have been given some good advice, I’m sorry to say that this man is cheating on you and treating you very badly. I think it will just get worse if you stay with him.
In the end you really want someone that is going to respect you. I agree that this can just escalate to even worse behavior.
That is right, without respect you have very little left. Find someone who values you as a person and knows how to treat you with respect.
Can you talk to your family or to a close friend about this, it sounds as if you need some support to deal with this.
If he is lying and having sex chats with someone else he is obviously not putting you first or respecting you in any way. I would definitely rethink staying with this person.
I am actally ging through this stage disrespect,mind games,controlling and yes physical.we have been together for 11 months and i still cant leave him i haven’t found the strengt to let go..explain that one?!!
You need to let him go and realize how much better off you will be because of it. I know it’s hard when you have feelings for someone, but he’s been so disrespectful of you. If he cared as much for you as you do for him, he wouldn’t be treating you this way. Tell him to get lost and no matter how bad he makes you feel for it, remember that it’s the right thing to do. Trust me, you’re better off without someone like this in your life, he’ll drag you down and destroy any self esteem you have. You deserve more than this.
He does not have any respect for you.
What is worst, you don’t have any respect for yourself.
Until you learn how to stand up for yourself and not allow yourself to be disrespected, the same types of things will continue to happen……no matter who you are with at the time.
Even if you dumped this man and started a relationship with someone else, you would probably allow the new person to treat you the same way. So it isn’t the man, it is you.
You have to be the one to stop the bad treatment. You are special. You have wants and needs. You have feelings and opinions that should be cherished. Just make sure that your significant other realizes that.
I think it would be a good idea to let this guy go. I think you deserve better than that.
I also think it’s an indication of more problems to follow that he’s having this kind of trouble being monogamous after only seven months. Some people never intend to be faithful.
I know that it’s so hard to let go of someone you love, but this man seems very abusive to me. You deserve much better than him. I know you probably can’t see that right now, but you DO. Dump him.
I am going through the same thing. I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 6 months. We were GREAT in the beginning but around the 3rd to 4th month he started getting really distant. He would want to hang out with me as much and I am currently unemployed so I dont have much to do so if I get the chance to hang out with him than I take it! He has been texting his “girl” friends since we have been together saying goodnight and goodmorning to them…..but not to me. He keeps telling me he is tired after working 4-6 hours at our local target as a cashier ( not much to the job but OK) and it wears him out. Well I had been feeling down and depressed and had brought up some issues bothering me. We talked through them and he said he isnt hiding anything from me and no he isnt cheating on me. Yet I was helping my friend with her buisness and her and me and my boyfriend have hung out a few times. O by the way…im 22. he is 23 and my friend is 32! well they had been chatting cuz she has been trying to figure out his deal on why hes been acting the way he is. Well i had to use my friends phone cuz mine is turned off…..I had opened a text message from him to her sayin that he wants to (sorry for the language) fuck her real hard and he wants her soooo bad. she responds ( all while I am working with her I mind you) that he makes her wet and horny and wants him to fuck her good and hard. I went BALISTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I confronted her and she said she never wrote any of that and its not what I think it is. I confronted him about it and all he had to say was I DONT KNOW! Then he continued with I was helping to boost her self esteem. Well my friend is known for being a HUGE cheater on her 70 year old husband cuz she claims he dont treat her right. She also told me she would NEVER go after any of my boyfriends. BOY WAS I WRONG!!!!!!! And then she followed up with I was testing him! I wanted to make sure he is right for you!!!! RIGHT FOR ME?! IN WHAT WAY?!?!?! By fucking him behind my back thinking I wont find out and that I obviously was so dumb to not know. They both cant give me a straight reason as to why it happened and they both cant really give me a good apology ( especially my boyfriend) about it. He keeps saying drop it! It wont happen again. I love you and only you and want to only be with you! Seriously? He expects me to just drop it? I trusted my friend and she betrayed me. I trusted my boyfriend and he betrayed me. I am giving him another chance to prove to me he means what he says and he promised me nothing will be secret anymore because that was why I snooped to find out what was going on. Am I doing the right thing? O and not to mention my friend has an STD. She NEVER told him about it. WHat would of happened if they really did hook up? I would of contracted it from him hooking up with her. Did they not stop to think of consiquences? And they said just cuz they talked about it and there might of been intentions of doing something…nothing would of happened. And not all people act on intentions. Well i see this as pre-meditated adultry with someone’s best friend. SHould i trust both of em ever again? Should I drop them both? I can totally understand and relate to what Dee said but how do I handle it? PLEASE HELP!
And not to mention….I love this man with all my being. He told me I care to much cuz he has never had someone care about him as much as I do. Is that a hint that this will happen again? I cant imagine living without loving him!
Hopefully, you listened to the wonderful advice that has been given by the people above. We all deserve respect. People who mean what they say back it up with actions.
respect. so over-rated yet so essential.
my partner of 3 years has been cheating on me..i heard him speak to another woman on the phone telling her “he had the urge to speak to her” yet when we talk its always fussing and fighting. i confronted him and he said it was someone from work? he has been so aggressive since and will not have a conversation with me. i dont know why i even care.
i have the number to this other woman and i tried to contact her. i know he has told her some lame story about how i am a stalking ex-girlfriend (which is a pack of lies) and now the other woman is too scared to talk to me!
what do i do
I was just thinking about this some more and how people ignore the signs. Things change for a reason; attention changes. We just don’t want to see it. Whatever this guy’s motivation is for not ending the relationship, clearly he doesn’t really want to keep it going. I wish you the best of luck.