Comments on: Getting Back the Love of Your Husband or Wife

By: Liza

Liza — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 02:19:40 +0000

There are certain things that are relatively easy to overlook and to give a chance, cheating is not one of them.

By: flowerhorn08

flowerhorn08 — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 00:43:42 +0000

Well, I wish all the best to the people who want to get back to their partners. As for me, I won’t give it a second though as I think habit dies hard. It will next to impossible for a person to change his/her habit and attitude.

By: SageMother

SageMother — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 21:46:39 +0000

“…if you trust someone you make yourself vulnerable to being let down. …”

I think this varies greatly with age and experience. Where the younger and, perhaps, more romantic people, both male and female, will trust in a way that renders them vulnerable to a large degree, there are other people who trust just enough to be comfortable, meaning they don’t trust so much that they feel vulnerable.

It might be that tenuous balance between trusting but not feeling vulnerable in doing so, that creates a bit of resilience in some marriages where others would fail under the weight of infidelity.

It’s a thought, anyway!

By: justontime

justontime — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 20:03:30 +0000

Chris I think you are right, you have to make a judgement depending on the person and the circumstances. It is a brave decision to forgive and move on because you risk being hurt again, but sometimes it is worth the risk.

By: berlinlife06

berlinlife06 — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 18:40:27 +0000

Seeing it case by case and very personal situations, I don’t think I could, simply because I am too jealous and I know it would be very very hard for me to forgive unfaithfulness. But I respect and admire people that can do that.

By: chris1203

chris1203 — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 16:05:53 +0000

I think that you also have to judge this on a “case by case” basis…if I felt that my husband was a “hound dog,” I would have not considred reconciling with him. But there were reasons that he did what he did. Being unfaithful is not his way of being.

By: justontime

justontime — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 08:06:42 +0000

That’s the thing about trust, if you trust someone you make yourself vulnerable to being let down. If that happens it makes it very hard to trust again.

By: Liza

Liza — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 19:05:24 +0000

It’s very difficult, I know of someone who forgave and the man did the same again only with someone even younger. Experiences like those cause you to not want to give a chance for the future.

By: SageMother

SageMother — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 20:37:18 +0000

I don’t know that I could go back into a relationship with someone who had betrayed me, and I am not even considering affairs. Just the fact that they would talk about me to their friends has usually been enough for me to end dating relationships, much less those actions tha tmost people think of when they hear the word “infidelity”.

By: chris1203

chris1203 — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 17:16:18 +0000

Thanks flowerhorn and Justontime…I’m not saying that getting through this experience has been easy; it has actually been HELL. But situations don’t occur in life in a vacuum and without any relationship to what has gone on in the relationship leading up to the affair. For that reason, alone, I think it benefits both people to really examine the relationship to see what may have caused the initial unhappiness that led to the affair.