Comments on: My Husband Cheated and Fathered a Child with the OW

By: hunterpiesmommy

hunterpiesmommy — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 21:13:40 +0000

Hello Jennifer
My Husband had cheated on my last year and I found out a week before christmas than he broke it off with me xmas eve. I have a one year old son with him and he is the presious lil guy After I had found out he had cheated I also found out that he was using so I felt our lives were in danger so I pack whatever that I could pack in the car of my sons and I left. Than he calls me weeks later saying he was sorry and he needed me so I went but only to find out that he was still seeing that witch I would like to call her something esle. This whole I love you and needed u crap went on for almost a year. Last year in February he had told me that she was pregnant. Today that child is 3monthsthe old and we have been together since oct 3and he has been clean on the same day. But now that the other child sis born he wants to visit the child and introduce our 1year old to his half brother I don’t want him to I feel like it will ruined his lil happiness and lil personality that he has. My husband want me to help care for his other child I had told him I will but im not sure I f I really can asthat child will be a contestants remind of what he had done to ruin our family. He tells me to get over it what done is done nothing he can do about. I’ve been through he’ll and back for him now im not sure if I want to stay wit him

By: Denise Dawson

Denise Dawson — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 16:32:51 +0000

My husband cheated as well and there is a women with two kids; we have four children and have been married 27 years. He had them “hidden”, and when confronted with the truth was remorseful. I am, however, totally devestated, as are our children. The level of deceipt and coverup are almost too hard to bear. I find myself obsessing as well. I have contacted a counselor for help with healing. He has rededicated himself to me and our children, but it hurts so much, I really don’t know if I am capable of forgiving him or if I should. Upon contact with this OW, her attitude and tone were disrespectful, which only added insult to injury. I feel oftentimes numb inside, and trust is not there for me. I pray that I can forgive, if not, it will be much easier for me to not have him in my life. He will always be our children’s father, but I would rather not have him in my life if I can not get past the pain.

By: Aly

Aly — Sat, 08 Oct 2011 15:16:42 +0000

I am going through almost the same issue in my marriage. We have three boys together and my husband (not even being married for six months) got drunk and had an affair four times in one night. Now the woman is expecting but doesn’t know who the father is. She doesn’t want the child and was using drugs hoping to kill the life inside her. Thankfully, she was picked up and through in jail for drug use. The worst thing of all this is my husband cheated on me five weeks later with a “friend”. I don’t know how I’m handling all this, but I can tell u I take it day by day. Life is a miracle that we should enjoy. Think of your children and yourself now. Focus on what your children’s and YOUR needs and wants are. I’m still with my husband and he tells me he has to bare with his actions of hurting and betraying the kids and me ever day. He also is trying to earn my trust back. Believe me, it’s not going to be easy. My heart goes out to you and I feel your pain. Look inside yourself for the power to know you’re a better person and you deserve to be happy. Good luck and my thoughts are with u.

By: Kellie

Kellie — Mon, 22 Aug 2011 17:50:58 +0000

I just recently found out that he fathered a baby with another woman. He didn’t tell me. I found out by her social network picture and when I confronted him he played stupid, until I showed him the proof. We have almost 15 years and 2 young children together. He wants to work things out. I want him to disappear forever because that would hurt less. I love him and I want to go to counseling to try to work things out. But I don’t know how I could ever trust him when he goes to pick up this child or drop it off to the OW. And how do you get past where the child came from and learn to accept and love that child? I know that if we work things out, that child will be a part of the rest of our lives. I don’t want to treat that child with resentment or want to be hurt every time the OW comes to get her child. My children deserve to know their sibling and I feel like my kids deserve to know that I tried every thing possible to make them have their dad and me in the same household. How do you deal with this??

By: Angel

Angel — Sun, 05 Jun 2011 15:48:25 +0000

Jennifer19, I can totally feel literally where your coming from with a cheating husband. I’ve only been remarried to my 1st husband since June 2010. By July 2010, my husband moved a couch for her, by Aug 2010 he was contacting her directly by phone, then the beginning of Sept 2010 they were being intimate. Oct 2010 is when I found out & he didn’t even flinch when I confronted him. We made up the 1st time on Oct 26th & I thought the affair was over. I had found out on the internet & from him that she was trying to get pregnant & that they had talked about having a child together before I even knew about the affair. The claim from him the reason why he did it was finally revealed to me this past Sunday. It has taken him 6 or 7 months for it to come out of his mouth why he cheated. Now she’s pregnant, 3 months to be exact! I have NO CHILDREN OF MY OWN. HIS 1 & ONLY DESCENDANT will be 22yrs old this year & he’s refusing to have a DNA test done as well because he states, “WHY HAVE A DNA TEST DONE WHEN I KNOW FOR A FACT IT’S MINE?” The thing is though is that he truly don’t know if it’s his. His mistress was with him when they were 17 & 18 but they never got pregnant. He was with his son’s mother for several yrs & they had his one & only child. When we were married the 1st time, we were together for 9yrs & I never got pregnant. He has been with numerous other women since before we got back together in 2005 that were more than fertile enough to have children & none of them got pregnant. Then we’ve been back together for 6yrs now & I still haven’t been pregnant. Now he has this affair that lasted from Sept 2010 to Feb 2011 & he’s not wanting a DNA test done????? He should be the 1st one to want a DNA test done. PICTURE THIS (HE’S 40YR OLD WILL BE 41YR OLD THIS YR) HE’S ONLY HAD 1 CHILD ALMOST 22YRS AGO & HAS NEVER GOTTEN ANYONE ELSE EVER PREGNANT! What is wrong with this picture? Now she’s 39yr will be 40yr this year & why her & why now & why does he want this kid so much? Jennifer the only difference between your situation & mine at the moment is that the kid isn’t here yet to have the test done. If she makes it full term I will then have to live @ looking @ that child & being reminded of his infidelities as well. Also that your husband is being a concerned, wanting to keep you & be open with you, answering your questions & wanting to prove you & the kids is where he wants to be. I love my husband as well & I am living my nightmare everyday as well. The only thing I can tell you going through the same thing……I’ve already been through all I can go through with my husband. Learning about the affair, making up, the affair continuing, making up, being committed into a mental institute, making up, the affair continuing, kicking him out finally, making up, end result just to find out that she’s now pregnant. I’m doing the best that I can to keep my sanity as well. I say I only wish my husband would act like yours through this difficult time in our lives. If you LOVE YOUR HUSBAND STILL & your feelings are strong enough that you yourself think you can survive, THEN STAY & WORK IT OUT! It’s hard enough that the kids are involved, but truth is you can’t stay just for the kids because as long as you talk to them if their old enough to understand & let them know what’s going on (trying to refrain yourself from bashing him) then they may take the breakup a little better. It’s still going to hurt everyone involved to not have everyone together anymore but sometimes lives are better lived apart. In my case I am madly deeply still IN LOVE with my husband & I am choosing to stay & try to work it out with my husband, because I want to believe we will survive this. I believe if you believe in your marriage as well it would be worth it to try. I look at it this way, I’ve already been through all that can be thrown at me, I owe it to my devotion still to my marriage to try to continue to work on it through the birth & demand & even court order if I can a DNA test not only for him to know if he’s the true father but also for me & his son as well. His own son doesn’t even believe that it’s his dad’s. So I say if you love your husband & want to work on saving your marriage then GO FOR IT GIRL! It’s definitely gonna be hard & you’ll have your days that you feel like just walking up to him & socking him right in the face, keep faith & love in your heart. I wish you the best of luck & hope your marriage will survive successfully

By: eva quispe

eva quispe — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 16:33:23 +0000

i hate all wives cheaters cause pain destroy lives die in hell

By: jennifer novakovic

jennifer novakovic — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 04:55:10 +0000

Dear Narisha, i resent the fact that you are addressing all of us a morons, i am not one, you no nothing of my life or even what it feels like to be hurt and betrayed that way , i was and still am a good loving an loyal wife to a man ive done nothing but do everything for and have sacrifised everything for him,my husband did what he did because he was a coward and a loser he couldnt deal with life, his excuses were a midlife crisis and the fact that he couldnt deal or stand by his wife of 26 yrs who was battling a life threatening illness, he went of to get laid while i had to raise our two children alone and fight for my life while batteling severe illnesses,we were always happy and never were unhappy , he just looked for an escape rather than be supportive and honor his vows .he forgot about in sickness and in healt part.he not only destroyed mine and my childrens lives but he destroyed his familys to,he blew off his kids to great dad he is.i will tell you this the other women in my case is a coniving bitch who does everything she can to hurt me and my children, she knew from day one that he was married and knew he was not gonna leave his wife she lied and said she couldnt get pregant and did any way mind you she has 3 other kids so she not infertile as she claimed,she has done nothing but harrass me and my kids with cruel emails and phone calls telling me all about there sexual exploits, plus she lies and tells me stories that i dont know my husband and that he still wants her and plans onleaving me and the kids mind you we are stronger nad better than ever so she lied and she lost but she doesent get the message,.also she uses her own 4 yr old to tell stories of there affair to my kids so they tell me so you see what a great mom she is i would never use any child in that way. i will tell you ryan who is the other child is well treated and well loved and he adores me i treat him with all the love and respect just the same as i do my own,i believe he belongs with his mom because he after all is a victim just as much as we are, he an innocent in all this and my heart breaks for him when he will learn the truth . he will be destroyed just as my kids were but the diference is i would help him thorugh it and not use him to hurt his own siblings or step mom. so this is to let you know my marriage was good and solid he was just a coward and ran when his wife got ill and and he couldnt deal with getting older to bad for him we all deal with stuff the diffrence between me and him is that i stood by hima nd will always be there for him and my children and even be there for my step son ryan i am more of a man than he wil ever be i will let you know wr are working through it and are stronger than ever she and no other women will ever come between our marriage again, i forgave him half way it will take me time he still had alot of work to do to be a better dad and hubby and make up for all the pain and suffering he caused but we will give him time and support him so please understand it from a women who has walked a mile in ,my shoes,i will agree the child should stay with his mom one no matter how much of a bitch she is deserves to lose her child , jen

By: Narisha

Narisha — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 14:07:11 +0000

Calypso: Thanks for being a voice of sanity among all these morons. The OW is a human being who was also duped and hurt by the man. I am sure that she loves her child just as much or even more than anyone else. For her he isn’t a mistake but the result of her love for this man. The child is not some object to be fought over and dragged around to satisfy someone else’s ego. Wake up people would you have liked anyone to rip you away from your birth mother because they can’t accept the fact that the marriage was damaged in the first place and that is the reason why the father was out looking for other unsuspecting women.

By: jennifer

jennifer — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 19:01:31 +0000

dear diagada,im sorry that you have to deal with such a deranged women my husbands mistress was no better she wrote me for yrs on reunion .com telling me all about their affair and all the lovely details as well at first it destroyed me my kids are still amess over this womens medling but i put a stop to her i wrote her and letter and told her what the deal . was . i blocked her from contacting meand and told her if she calls my home or trys to come here or ever writes me again i will get the police involved. your husband did the right thing getting the police involved.what ever yuo rhusband does as far as custody is up to the both of you if you stay toghther .you have a long road ahead of you and need time to heal and your children need time to heal. both of you must work together.this will not get solved in a day.it will take yrs to solve.i wish you both luck but remember to help yourself and dont forget to take care of yourself and you children . good luck and i will pray for your family take care and keep in touch.love jennifer

By: Diagada

Diagada — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 11:58:49 +0000

Well the child is his. She has been stalking and harassing the whole family. She showed up at my older daughter’s house to tell her the news. Hey, do you want to meet your little sister? My husband hadn’t even opened his mail yet. He pressed charges for stalking and harassment and she was served 2 citations. I hope she has to go to jail.
He threatened her about taking sole custody. Maybe she will just disappear. If he does get custody he is giving it up for adoption. Thanks for your support. D