Are We A Bunch Of Cheaters?
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34 Responses to “Are We A Bunch Of Cheaters?”
April 19th, 2008 at 4:44 pm
Could be. I think every now and then we are ready for something new and exciting in our lives. Which doesn’t mean we love our significant others any less. But it is what the “new and exciting” leads to that can cause problems that we later regret.
April 19th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
I think men do themselves a real disservice when they blame their cheating on biology. It’s almost like claiming they have no mastery over their basic biological urges. I like think they’ve evolved a *little* more than that!
April 19th, 2008 at 11:56 pm
Even though biology does have a lot to do with infidelity in humans , in general, the complicity in institutions that define “manhood” through virility and entitlement, don’t help.
April 20th, 2008 at 1:46 pm
SageMother, that was wonderfully put and a very valid point. Men are almost *encouraged* to spread it around.
April 20th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
I personally think it takes more of a man to walk a way from a relationship with someone first before cheating.
April 21st, 2008 at 8:44 am
Tater, I agree with you and I’ve said that to friends who cheat. “If you’re that unhappy, for God’s sake leave, don’t break your wife’s heart with an affair.” Doesn’t seem to help much, though. They never think they’re going to get caught…
April 27th, 2008 at 2:18 pm
I just find it so selfish of a person to cheat. Honestly I can understand how people get attracted to others but again just leave first.
April 27th, 2008 at 7:46 pm
It’s been my experience that most people–both men and women–who cheat don’t anticipate getting caught, even if they make every stupid mistake in the book. I knew one man who charged expensive dinners with his…er…mistress to a bank account he shared with his wife, sent messages to her from his home computer, and even left pictures of the two of them together around the house. And he was *stunned* when his wife confronted him and threw him out on his tail. How did she ever find out, he wailed. Um…three guesses!
April 29th, 2008 at 6:39 pm
Trick-r-treat, the grass is always going to be greener on the other side, until of course, when you get there, and it’s not so green anymore.
April 30th, 2008 at 2:35 am
Tater, I would agree. But I can see how some people aren’t brave enough to make that break until they’re certain that the new relationship is going to work out. Not that I condone that sort of behaviour.
April 30th, 2008 at 1:57 pm
Calypso, LOL!
Well, I’m not so sure if the evolution cycle is even completed
Seems like they are still a little further behind than womenhood’s understanding how life works.
April 30th, 2008 at 2:44 pm
SageMother, because of all of these definitions, we are all born with pre-conceived notions on what is expected from our gender.
Now, if we can only break all these barriers, I think we would be a better civilization as a whole.
April 30th, 2008 at 2:56 pm
Green-Moo, LOL!
You think? I swear I thought I was just imagining it
April 30th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Tater03, ah, more of the mythical man….
April 30th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
Calypso, I’ve actually had a friend tell me that “she’s going to get hurt no matter what” and decided to pursue a second relationship.
What a chicken.
May 2nd, 2008 at 4:08 pm
Sometimes they finally reach a stage they figure the relationship will work, but then it blows up, with no spouse and no sweetheart.
May 3rd, 2008 at 11:41 am
I’ve known people, too, who want to establish a stable relationship with someone else before they leave their current relationship. I guess being afraid to be alone has a lot to do with it. I’m actually one of those weird puppies who is happier single, so it’s hard for me to understand…
May 3rd, 2008 at 4:59 pm
Some people stay in these relationships because they worry about what others will think of them.
Apparently, the pain of cheating doesn’t out weigh the embarrassment they would feel surrounding a failed marriage.
May 5th, 2008 at 1:56 pm
Tater03, it’s all about selfishness on the part of the cheater, that’s for sure.
May 5th, 2008 at 2:52 pm
Calypso, not very smart was he??
May 6th, 2008 at 3:14 pm
Green-Moo, what I don’t understand is why people would think that they have enough reasons to break it off with the person they are with after six months of cheating. I understand that they are probably testing the waters a bit to see if this relationship is worth leaving their current one for. But, there’s just so many things wrong with that.
May 10th, 2008 at 7:02 pm
Liza, isn’t that always the case? Remorse really does come too late for too many people and all that’s left are memories. Not good ones either. How can it be when you’ve inflicted so much pain on another person.
May 11th, 2008 at 10:01 am
Oh I do agree that the argument is flawed, but it doesn’t stop people using it!
May 11th, 2008 at 11:10 pm
Calypso, I think being single is totally bliss! You get to do the things you want to do and you are only responsible for yourself. Unlike us…. we have to worry about our partners straying!
May 12th, 2008 at 8:58 am
SageMother, that is true especially with ethnic cultures. I know so many women who stay in relationships because of what their community might say. Leaving behind a failed marriage in this instance really does take a lot of guts.
May 16th, 2008 at 4:18 am
There are recent cases where women have been murdered by their own fathers and brothers for leaving their marriage. Sometimes I think that some of us forget how lucky we are to have the choices that we do.
May 20th, 2008 at 12:32 pm
Green-Moo, and can you believe it…. the other half who actually are being cheated on actually buy that crap!
One of my good friends had a girlfriend that was cheating on him. When he confronted her, she said “I didn’t want to hurt you by telling you” and he bought that hook, line and sinker.
May 20th, 2008 at 1:06 pm
Sometimes it is easier to believe a pathetic excuse like that than it is to accept the alternative.
May 20th, 2008 at 7:44 pm
OMG, your friend isn’t the only one who bought that “I-didn’t-want-to-hurt-you-by-telling-you” line. One of my friends fell for that one, too. Her partner told her, “You were emotionally fragile so I didn’t want to upset you.” I wondered, since she was so concerned about my friend’s feelings, why she had the affair in the first place!
May 22nd, 2008 at 12:29 am
Calypso, if that weren’t such a sad situation, an excuse that bad would actually be funny!
June 8th, 2008 at 8:20 pm
Green-Moo, here in Vancouver where we have a wide range of multicultural population, it always makes the news at least once every two months.
I think it is very sad that free will has been taken away from these women.
June 22nd, 2008 at 11:25 am
Green-Moo, what is it anyway with “turning your back on reality”?
It will encourage the cheater to cheat again in the future because the accountability of their previous actions were just swept under the carpet.
June 22nd, 2008 at 12:00 pm
Calypso, exactly! If she was concerned, she wouldn’t have had the affair.
June 24th, 2008 at 9:38 pm
Green-Moo, and I don’t know how they can say it with such a straight face.