Love in Disarray by Marzie
When you initially find yourself in a messy love triangle, you will yourself to remain strong, anticipating the brewing storm ahead. You fake happiness to others by pretending you still have him captivated under your spell. You embrace your memories ever so closely, hoping they won’t be your last and struggle to keep your emotions intact, fearing he’d notice and resent your vulnerability.
As days turn into weeks and weeks into months, you slowly start to lose resolve. It gets harder to maintain a strong facade. Each time you see him sending an “innocent” text message to her, your heart breaks. When you catch him smiling and whispering into his cell phone, your heart shatters into a million more pieces. A moment he stays away is an eternity of excruciation.
And yet, you persevere; desperately clinging to any hope of rekindling an inevitably dying romance. You refuse to allow that one constant leave your already topsy-turvy life so you continue to be a willing player in this torrid love affair, simply because it’s better to play than to be benched.
Despite your brave front, you’re slowly disintegrating inside. You despise yourself for compromising your principles to his notion of perfection. You’ve become a distant silhouette of your former self; changing into the person he so desired. Just when you’re about to lose your identity completely, you realize that he too has metamorphosed into a complete stranger that in no way resembles the guy you initially fell for.
And so you leave, walking out with what little strength and pride remaining within. You take consolation in acknowledging that love isn’t what you seek if it means having to be his second choice. You realize that once love turns into anger and hate rears its ugly head, the only way out of your insanity is to walk away and let him go. You recognize that dreams don’t always come true, no matter how badly you want them to but most of all you now understand that true love, whatever his standards, was never meant to be that hard.
About Marzie!
Marzie describes herself as an incurable romantic who loves to write about life, her adorable kitty cat Phoebe, and her obsession with perfumes! I’d like to thank her for contributing this insightful story of heartbreak to The Diva Network and I hope that you enjoyed reading it as much as I did. You can catch more of her at Mariuca - Wishing on a Falling Star and Mariuca’s Perfume Gallery.
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18 Responses to “Love in Disarray by Marzie”
June 18th, 2007 at 11:27 pm
[…] who loves to write about life, her adorable kitty cat Phoebe, and her passion for perfumes. Her Story about cheating boyfriends, love triangles, and heartbreak is being features on IDCheaters. You can […]
November 11th, 2007 at 7:07 pm
Interesting. I have never been in a love triangle, and honestly do not see why anyone would want to be.
November 15th, 2007 at 10:23 pm
3Plus3, Love’s kind of funny that way. You never know when it’s going to hit you, and you might end up with a bad hand which makes you the other woman in a relationship…..
Kind of sucks when that happens.
January 16th, 2008 at 7:25 pm
Love triangles are rarely ever that. They often involve so many other people that more than just three lives are shattered. Family, friends and children can easily be damaged by the sharpnel that’s thrown around once the love affair is discovered.
January 31st, 2008 at 8:35 pm
Debrajean, that is so true. It’s never just about the three of them.. It affects everyone else around them!
February 13th, 2008 at 6:12 am
It’s not easy when you are actually with one person and love another but it really depends on what you really want for yourself, sometimes the person you love don’t give a hoot about you and don’t care about tyou enough while there is another whom you love but not as much as the other, the choice is your of course.
February 22nd, 2008 at 10:57 am
Yes, it is true; love triangles never stay as three people. Friends, family, and children can all be pulled into this heartbroken hole. That’s a huge tragedy.
February 23rd, 2008 at 2:28 am
I’m sure no-one sets out to be in this situation. A love triangle is surely something that creeps up on you, and you accept because it seems like something you can’t avoid. I don’t know, I’ve not been there.
February 24th, 2008 at 11:28 am
The thrill of renewed emotions is a strong draw in triangles. Add in the forbidden fruit aspect and things get volatile.
For many people, the longing to be with the other lover is the excitement they seek, but when pinned down they are neer in the mood to leave their spouse. It’s sad, but often that third person is more an amusement ride than a serious consideration for the future.
March 3rd, 2008 at 1:44 pm
Liza, that’s natural to feel that way but you shouldn’t make it difficult for the other two people involved.
I think in the beginning you should chose and not keep both to see which direction you want to take months down the road.
March 7th, 2008 at 4:54 pm
MollyL, I don’t know why most people don’t realize that before they start an affair with someone who is married.
March 7th, 2008 at 6:01 pm
Green-Moo, I don’t think anyone really intentionally wants to be in a love triangle. But, I think you have to realize that if you are heading that way, to just move out of that path.
It will not only hurt others, but yourself as well.
March 10th, 2008 at 9:59 am
SageMother, that is true.
I think the third person involved would just be for amusement, and not really to be taken seriously.
You know how many times though I have heard the person who has been cheated on justify the cheating as that?
April 14th, 2008 at 3:36 pm
Marzie, what a sad story. I’m so sorry for everything you’ve been through. But good for you for finding the strength to leave when you realized the relationship was beyond saving. Too many women linger in that “half life” for years and years.
April 24th, 2008 at 10:59 pm
Calypso, if you’ve visited Marzie’s blog, you would know that she reaped the rewards in spades for leaving…..
She’s got such a great relationship with her husband!
April 26th, 2008 at 1:44 am
Hi Sharon! You know, this remains as one of my favorite posts till today. It was great writing this and even though the incident happened many moons ago and I’ve moved on and found real love with hubby, I can still feel the pain of being caught in a love triangle whenever I hear abt one from my friends! Happy weekend Sharon!
May 5th, 2008 at 2:59 pm
Mariuca, and what a great catch your husband is!
I guess life teaches us lessons that we might not have liked during the time so we can be stronger for today.
June 7th, 2008 at 6:07 pm
I wish I had half the strength of all of you people. I need to end a triangle and I know it. I’m the OW. I didn’t search for it. He did. I was vulnerable. I won’t go into details because it was a very, very vulnerable period in my life. I know I will soon enough, but until then I’m praying for the strength to do it…it is very difficult…